Global Associated News, which as far as news sources go is apparently a little less reliable then The Onion for truthiness, reported that Sheen died in a snowboarding accident while on holiday in Switzerland. From the site:
--Charlie Sheen was air lifted by ski patrol teams to a local hospital, however, it is believed that the actor died instantly from the impact of the crash. The actor was wearing a helmet at the time of the accident and drugs and alcohol do not appear to have played any part in his death. --
They probably should have added that he also just opened a Swiss bank account for good measure, that way they can play the paying-hookers-with-tax-evasion-monies angle. Now the only thing we have to wait for is the inevitable round of puns from the Internet's form of Troglodytes pontificating on how ironic it was that snow that caused his death.
Apparently, the good people of the Web receive a lot of joy from death hoaxes. First it was Bill Cosby. Russel Crowe was next. Then Morgan Freeman. Johnny Depp. Finally, Stephanie Meyer, author of the Twilight series. However, I may have to look into reports of Meyer's death hoax, they may just have been commenting on the death of her literary career, and rebirth in the realm of zombie rom-com novels and movies that men everywhere are tortured by in theaters. Gossip Cop, which is neither a cop nor much of a gossiper, debunked the report and is very, very serious about not liking these death hoaxes. I believe they made the movie "A Serious Man" which should have been called a "Serious Waste of Money" and two hours of my life. You better make it up in True Grit, Coen brothers. Yeah, that's right, I'm looking at you two.
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